Thursday, April 17, 2008

Q & A: "Sports or Girlfriend? "

Name: Amy/Truxton
Question: I did a stupid thing a month ago I went into my husband sign on and searched his email to see if he was having an affair with someone I was jealous off. Well he found out and we are separated now. We did sit down and talk and we decided the communication in our marriage wasn't there anymore. So we have put our marriage on the back burner and we are working on the friendship we haven't had in years. We think if we still have our friendship and we know we still have our love then we can make it. Is this the right thing to be doing?

Dear Amy,

Thanks for writing! There's nothing wrong that you're working on your friendship to make sure it's sound...But I'm not sure I understand the point of putting your marriage on the "backburner". Kinda seems like you're going about things back-a**ward. I'm glad you realize that communication is the key, but I'm also sort of shocked that you two separated because of your little foray into his sign-on...There must be more to this than what is apparent here. Good for you two that you're willing to work things out...Communication is one of the absolute foundations of any successful marriage... Trust is the other foundation. Work out your issues together, seek counseling if you need to. I think you'll make it through this just fine. Hope this helps, and best of luck to you!

Name: Sports or Girlfriend?
Question: I have recently broken up with my girlfriend. I need to know if I made a good or bad decision. I play basketball and it is really important to me. she is very important too though, and this is where the problem began. our starting center man (Ty) fractured his ankle at our last game. this means that I have to start in his place. I am really nervous because I don't want to let the team down, and I know that I am not as good as Ty. our next game is against an undefeated team and it is going to be a hard game. I feel that I need to concentrate only on basketball right now. I feel really bad that I am doing this to my girlfriend, but I had to break up with her so that I wasn't thinking about her. but now all I can think about is her. what should I do?

Dear Sports,

Hi there...Easy one...You simply need to figure out what will be more important to you in the long run...Her, or Basketball. I would think Her, as when the season is over, the season is over. Instead of breaking up with her, explain to her that for this next week, you really need to concentrate on the team, but that after this game, you'll have a little more time for her. Tell her you want her to come to the game, blah blah blah...There's no reason that you can't have your cake and eat it too in this situation. You should be able to maintain your sports as well as your girlfriend...Good luck.

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