Thursday, April 17, 2008

Q & A: "I really like him a lot, but my Mom don't like him"

Name: Kayla
City: MD
Question: I'm going out with this boy. I went out with him before once in the 6 and 7 grade. Now I am in the 8th grade. He broke up with me the last 2 times. This time he says he really likes me a lot. Should I believe him or not?
I Have another question. I really like him a lot, but my Mom don't like him. I think she don't like him because he broke up with me and also someone told her he was spreading rumors at school about me and he told me that he didn't spread them. So my 2 questions are does he really like me and how can I get my Mom to like him again?

Dear Kayla,

Hi there...Thanks for writing! Your Mom is certainly looking out for you on this one. She knows that he's hurt you twice before, and that he's spread rumors about you in school...Even if he did not spread them, it will be a while for your Mom to like or trust him again, and for good reason. The only way for him to get back into her good graces is for him to prove to her over time that he has your best interests at heart.

That being said, you guys are in 8th grade...It might help you to concentrate more on what's going to happen next year in high school rather than if this boy likes you a lot. You're going to be going through a lot of changes in the next 5 -10 years, so I wouldn't fret too much about what this boy likes you or not right now. If he does, then he has good taste...If not, then it's his loss. Either way Kayla, you've got your whole life ahead of you...I know it's hard to see this now, but by this time next year, this boy will most likely be long gone from your thoughts. Work hard on your own personal dreams and goals, and everything else will fall into place, including boys...I hope this helps, and take care of yourself. Good luck in school!

Name: Claudia
Question: In every relationship I've had I have felt that the other person has been embarrassed of me. I believe this because they don't let me meet friends/parents. They are often distant and generally like to exclude me. I am intelligent not unattractive, I have social skills and a strong career so why do men make me feel like a loser?

Hi Claudia,

Thanks for writing...That's a pretty broad-based question you have there at the end, so let's address it this way - Seems to me you're dating the wrong type of men. If you are with guys that you think are embarrassed of you in some way/fashion, then obviously they are not in the relationship wholeheartedly. You might like a certain type of man, but in actuality, this particular type clashes with what you want in a relationship. So change your focus...Also, don't forget one other thing - You can only have men "make you feel like a loser" by Allowing them to do so. Be strong within yourself and go for what you want and need. If anyone tries to put you down or make you feel less about yourself, they are not worth your time or energy. You have better things to do and more conducive people to be with...Hope this helps, and thanks for visiting! Don't be a stranger...

Name: Missie
City: Orlando
Question: Hi, I'm a high school senior, and out of a possible 24 credits I have 22. I live by myself and have to work a lot to pay bills and Because of this fact I've missed a lot of school, and therefor fell very far behind. Now there's more, I've been considering dropping out to work during the day, then just receiving the credit's I need online or taking up night school. The college I want to go to doesn't require a "High School Diploma" Just the Equivalent of one. I'm 18yrs old, I was held back in 7th grade, I've been forced to mature faster than I should (because of personal circumstances) and I am really "over" the high school thing, especially because I'm and adult now. I just need some advice. I could use the extra money that I save from working and move to New York on a scholarship to the American Musical and Dramatic Academy after, of course, I receive a diploma or a g.e.d. Or I could save the money and invest it in mutual funds. I'm just really between decisions right now. Please don't judge me, all I need right now is some real, and friendly advice. Thank You, sincerely Missie

Hi Missie,

Well, it certainly seems that your desire in life is Dancing/Stage, so why not go for it? If you have a scholarship lined up in New York, then by all means make it happen. Get your diploma/GED, and then move to NY and pursue your dreams. If you have the talent/wherewithall to land a scholarship, don't let it lie to waste...Get focused on it, and do it. Go after your dream - If you are successful, then you will be living your dream, and that's something that unfortunately doesn't happen for a lot of us. If you go for it and things don't work out, then you can move on to other goals, but at least you went for it. The last thing you want to do is mentally torture yourself with all the "what if's" if you don't pursue it. By simply chasing after your dream will provide closure, and that's important. And if you can get a scholarship, then it seems your chances of success are better than not, so why not try? I wish you all the luck in the world, and don't be a stranger...

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